Now most of the time, people like us have the liberty of making the choices in our lives.
But not always.
Cause sometimes (even as an adult), the people around you, make the choice for you, like as if you're incompetent to make good choices for yourself.
I recently went through one such incident that made me feel so small and rubbish. And it's quite disheartening.
There are many kinds of choices a person can choose. (obviously)
There is no "one particular choice" that can be generalized to work or be good for everyone.
"Good" and "bad" choices are so subjective.
And so when someone forces down a certain choice for me, I feel like telling them, "So you think I'm somehow incapable of making the right choice for myself? So you think that you have a say...a rightful say in my life? So you claim to know me and my life more than me? Go ahead, tell me how much you know about me, I'll tell you if you're even remotely close. Do you think you even know what you're doing in your life with the choices you made?"
People who make choices for others (who obviously can make their own choices) think they are super rational and righteous when they do so.
Well in fact, that is the height of being irrational.
Because even when people take all the advice given to them, they also are bound to make the wrong choices at times. Taking everyone's advice doesn't make you immune to life's ups and downs. And what happens when you make bad choices? You learn from your mistakes.
I mean I get that you should be prudent with the way you utilize your time, money and efforts. But you can't expect to always be right, especially for other peoples lives when you're not asked for your advice. Thank you, but no thank you for your unsolicited advice.
And anyway, what's so wrong at being wrong sometimes? People should be given the liberty to choose...even to choose bad choices.
There isn't any shame in taking responsibility for things that didn't work out.
And something I want to tell myself is, it's not your fault these controlling people are the way they are. They may have lost control in their own lives and they have learnt this maladaptive coping mechanism of forcing their "right" choices down other's throats.
As kids, we were always pushed into doing and being things the way our elders or friends told us to. After some point in time, however, we need to be free from it.
Free to choose.
I'm not saying elders shouldn't protect their children from bad things that could cause them harm. But why must you shove unrealistic expectations for their future? their body? their significant other? their career? Especially when that person is an adult!
If a choice is really bad, they will find it themselves. Respect and believe in people's decision-making skills. A person will properly weigh the risk-factors of their choices themselves.
You're not the only smart person here on this planet. And chances are, what worked for you or for someone you heard about, won't work for them. Do you really want to be the cause for someone's unhappiness that much? I don't think so.
But not always.
Cause sometimes (even as an adult), the people around you, make the choice for you, like as if you're incompetent to make good choices for yourself.
I recently went through one such incident that made me feel so small and rubbish. And it's quite disheartening.
There are many kinds of choices a person can choose. (obviously)
There is no "one particular choice" that can be generalized to work or be good for everyone.
"Good" and "bad" choices are so subjective.
And so when someone forces down a certain choice for me, I feel like telling them, "So you think I'm somehow incapable of making the right choice for myself? So you think that you have a say...a rightful say in my life? So you claim to know me and my life more than me? Go ahead, tell me how much you know about me, I'll tell you if you're even remotely close. Do you think you even know what you're doing in your life with the choices you made?"
People who make choices for others (who obviously can make their own choices) think they are super rational and righteous when they do so.
Well in fact, that is the height of being irrational.
Because even when people take all the advice given to them, they also are bound to make the wrong choices at times. Taking everyone's advice doesn't make you immune to life's ups and downs. And what happens when you make bad choices? You learn from your mistakes.
I mean I get that you should be prudent with the way you utilize your time, money and efforts. But you can't expect to always be right, especially for other peoples lives when you're not asked for your advice. Thank you, but no thank you for your unsolicited advice.
And anyway, what's so wrong at being wrong sometimes? People should be given the liberty to choose...even to choose bad choices.
There isn't any shame in taking responsibility for things that didn't work out.
And something I want to tell myself is, it's not your fault these controlling people are the way they are. They may have lost control in their own lives and they have learnt this maladaptive coping mechanism of forcing their "right" choices down other's throats.
As kids, we were always pushed into doing and being things the way our elders or friends told us to. After some point in time, however, we need to be free from it.
Free to choose.
I'm not saying elders shouldn't protect their children from bad things that could cause them harm. But why must you shove unrealistic expectations for their future? their body? their significant other? their career? Especially when that person is an adult!
If a choice is really bad, they will find it themselves. Respect and believe in people's decision-making skills. A person will properly weigh the risk-factors of their choices themselves.
You're not the only smart person here on this planet. And chances are, what worked for you or for someone you heard about, won't work for them. Do you really want to be the cause for someone's unhappiness that much? I don't think so.
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