Food isn't the enemy

I experience....social anxiety while eating.
This post is a reminder to me and to all who suffer from similar problems while eating, that says the obvious (that isn't so obvious at times).... Food is not the enemy.

Food isn't an enemy. It's a friend. I don't care about how many people told you otherwise. It doesn't make it true. Food will help you do everything you need to, by giving you the strength, nutrition and repair that your body needs.
People may have made you feel small and insignificant cause of what? Eating slowly? Eating less? That's ridiculous. Cause there's obviously more to life than just eating.
Some have even tried to make you jealous by how fast and how much they can eat. But there's no shame in knowing your limits and sticking to it... You know how much you can eat and you don't overdo it. You shouldn't pressure your body to take in so much food when it doesn't want as much. It's alright. It's great to know about yourself.

People pretend to know you.... Know why you're skinny... Know why you eat in the time duration you do. But they don't know anything.
And maybe I know they don't know me at all, nor what they're saying.... But it still hurts.

Because I thought we were cool. I thought you were my friend. Maybe the hurt I feel is my shattered expectation of that person being decent and respectful of me.
Because it would literally kill some people to think of others for a change.

Turns out, even I don't know those people all that well. Cause who knows about their insecurities? Maybe this is just one way they get to be better than me in something.

I'll let this one slide.

I may have had a bad relationship with food throughout my life. This weird hatred for food, fueled by my insecurities, thoughts on how it seemed to define me in front of others, comments, unsolicited advise and so on, had led me to feel so anxious while eating.

Well the truth is, it doesn't matter. The way I eat, how much I eat, how slowly I eat... doesn't matter at all.
What matters is that I'm healthy.
What matters are the cherished memories I share of my loved ones during meals. What matters is all the people who have willingly listened to me explain to them about my eating problem and have taken me seriously. What matters is the enjoyment I aim to have at every meal no matter who is there and what they will say about my eating choices. Because I already know and choose what's best for me and body and your hurtful comments aren't.

I really look forward to the day eating becomes something very casual and stress-free for me. But until then, I can always try, right?

Plus, good people aren't always fast eaters.... Just saying.